Living by the gong. 10 (almost) days of silence Vipassana review PART 2 (of 2)
DAY 2 and I’m already noticing that my dreams are easily more vivid.
It’s getting easier and easier to not be swayed by thoughts.
The back pain is getting a bit more intense and my bum is pretty dead. I’m used to spending long periods of time sat down, but 13 hours of meditation in the same position us another story.
The boredom is starting to kick in now, but it’s giving me lots of time to myself to go soul searching through lots of programs I might be running.
DAY 2 DISCOURSE
S.N.Goenke talks about “Do unto others as you’d have them do to you”and reinforces how most techniques, just access the “monkey mind” and don’t go beyond that.
DAY 3 – DAY 4
We finally get given the next step and what is known as the true Vipassana technique. As soon as I’m given the next step of noticing sensations all over the body, I’m soon able to transcend the body.
My body went to a place of absolution.. a feeling it had dissolved and all the pain and discomfort from sitting for hours left.
In that moment I got that there was nothing more to learn and that I would be going soon.
I let the teacher know that my intuition was telling me I’d be going soon. He didn’t react well.
The whole premise is that you observe the sensations without moving, to such a degree that allows the deepest programs to come up and be released. In my opinion though, I don’t see how that can work all the time.
I BELIEVE that your soul wants to bring your EGO into alignment with what’s going on (often referred to duality in Gnostic teachings and other ancient ideologies) otherwise you’re not becoming “enlightened” or “wiser” to what is truly showing up in your life. Instead your soul will manifest situations, challenges and other happenings so that you can get the lesson and understanding.
That night (day 4) the guy opposite me (the other side of the curtain) called out again around 2am in the morning.
“What the hell?! Nooooo!”
This time I wasn’t naked from under the bed covers and I knew It had nothing to do with me. This carried on for most nights before he left the course early! Bless him and his night terrors 🙁
DAY 5
Stubbed me toe on the first moments leaving our dorm on the edge of the door as I was closing it.. I was just about to swear… sh*t! I can’t. My usual mechanism is to laugh hysterically to deal with immediate pain. “Am I even aloud to laugh?!” 😛 I wasn’t sure lol
During mediation the video recording of S.N.Goenke is covering the difference between
Believing something to be true blindly #BlindFaith
Knowing intellectually something to be true
Owning it to be true – actually integrating it at the experiential level
Couldn’t agree more! Knowing something to be true VS owning it are completely different things and when you do the latter, that’s when things show up differently in your life and you feel differently also
“Keep following the sensations throughout your body. The itching, tingling, heat, cold, sweating and throbbing” (yep Pete is on that thread for sure!) it’s been 5 days of just being around men!
That afternoon I got that a message had been left to head home as my daughters carer had bailed. My instincts were right.
The Universe works perfectly.
DAY 6
By this point I’m utilising the technique and with so much time on my hands, I’m feeling into everything and anything that has a thread in my life currently. I’m able to see that any trauma or programs I’m still running have a sightly different feel and density when I’m picking up on the sensations throughout my body.
From that point I:
1) Acknowledge the program/meaning
2) Observe what caused me to ascribe that meaning given what happened
3) Feel the feeling to embrace it more and bring up the energy stronger
Then..
4) See the gift of the situation on a soul level, of how I become more of myself and why it showed up in my reality and how my reality will now change
5) Release it and do some integration work, making sure to check all bases as to whether there are any other timelines affected (e.g. ancestral, past life etc..)
Then it releases and integrates and I’m onto the next thing.
THIS I FEEL is the biggest thing missing from Vipassana and many techniques of this ilk. Maybe it’s just me and everyone I’ve met and finally been able to release their stuff, that without the understanding as to why something is there, what the gift is and how it’s part of your soul journey and destiny… how can it truly integrate at the deepest level?
What do you feel? Would love to know! 🙂
Conclusion SUMMARY
PROS:
1. Time away from everyone and everything can yield great results as you accelerate the time with yourself uninterrupted
2. A different environment and not being able to communicte and talk adds to the first point
3. I was getting up at 4am (ish) every day to practice my out of body astral travelling and having a gong each has now cemented this into my routine and am getting up at 4am with ease
4. The technique does work
5. If you’ve not been on a retreat before, great intro and it’s low cost!
6. Removes yourself from the world you’re currently used to!
CONS:
1. Dogmatic – teachers teaching the course haven’t questioned the technique enough. There isn’t enough background work and open questioning of all realities enough. Not enough other stuff to work with other than attending another course.
2. A beginner won’t get enough tools to go into the outside world and be able to reciprocate the effects of 8+ hours of meditation each day
3. The technique was developed when the planet and everything on it was very different
4. I feel something to write with during the course as insights flood in would be an advantage not a distraction. I’ve heard the same from many other attendees who’ve been.
CONCLUSION FINAL:
On the last day I was there, I saw a girl go up and ask the female teacher (on the women’s side) about some trauma that was coming up in her chest.
She was given the instruction to just allow the feeling and move on to the next part of her body.
I just disagree with this. I picked up on that she wasn’t speaking her truth to her dad and other masculine representatives in her life and she didn’t feel her feelings were acknowledged. Having integrated it, it would have helped her acting career and allowed her to impact more people. As it is, she will likely leave (feels like it’s still there now on the penultimate day) without being able to realise why it is in showing up and why her soul asked for that lesson and why she feels the way she does towards her dad.
I loved Vipassana, but less so for the technique and more so for the time by myself to do so much concentrated work without clients, Facebook and day to day life to take me away from peeling the layers so intensely.
Always follow your gut. Go if you feel inspired, there will be something you’re supposed to get, but I feel the technique is old paradigm and needs upgrading. The dogma, the hierarchy… its not as efficient as it could be. For some people it’s life changing, but I’d say that those people are at the beginner end of their journey…
I talk more about some of this video. Hence adding it to this post. I’ve zoomed in to protect my friends identity, if you want to see the whole process we did though, jump in my “Self Awareness with Duke” group.
***Remember***
Anything that is showing up in your life is showing up as an opportunity for you to learn or grow.. and ultimately know yourself (at a soul level) that little bit more!
This is modern life. Question that. Feel into everything and always endeavor to get to know your own truth from within before taking on anything blindly.
P.S. loved the week I was there. I may come across a bit harsh. Just my view and my experience. I feel I could improve the workings and learnings of the course and bring it up to speed with the latest faster methods of integrations and awareness of self. I would however charge for it, as that way people are more vested rather than needing Dogma to get them under control.
Oh and the pic that’s S.N.Goenke in all his joyfulness